Caligula 1: Round 9

 

 Last round, Kentucky Beesly once again managed to avoid being discovered by his...partner, Paris, as he chased his lifetime want of WooHoo-ing with 20 different Sims. Paris, still caught up in the day-to-day grind of raising two young children, Toyota and Madrid, didn't see anything suspicious about Kentucky's behavior and continued to try and convince him to marry her. His actions did not go unnoticed by Paris's parents, Kalliope and Matthew; however, by the end of the week both of them had passed away from old age. To help with the grief, the family adopted a puppy named Rosco.

 

Madrid: Hello...I'm sorry, who is this? We don't know anybody by that name...


Kentucky: Um...I'll take that, Madrid. It's probably for me.

Madrid: Why are all these women calling you?

 

Amy: You know, not a lot of adults ask me to set them up on dates...

Kentucky: I know...

 

Well, Zoe is a romance Sim...but she also has a toddler at home. Not a good choice, Kentucky.

 

 Huh? We're purchasing the community center?

 

 Madrid: But Dad, you guys don't have to buy a community lot for me. I'll start working on my 5 businesses once I get out of college. 

Kentucky: Nonsense! If you get the deed now, once you graduate you'll be all set to go. But until then, I'll head down there during the day and get things set up.

Madrid: But why put the deed in my name now? I'm still in high school.

Kentucky: Well, it will just save us paperwork later on. Do me a favor, though. Keep this a secret from your mother. She'll um...think I'm spoiling you.

   

 This is getting things set up for your daughter?

Kentucky: Listen, I'm sorry about last week...I've got a bed in the back...

Marisa: Really....sounds interesting.

 

 Doing some yardwork?

Paris: Kentucky wants us to join the garden club. It sounds like a good idea, but we have to make sure all the hedges are trimmed.

   

 Hey, look who just happened to walk by! It's Roger Beesly's brother, Mark! This could work out well.

 

 At least Kentucky is achieving something positive this week...

 

Seriously, how is Paris not noticing this? First the $75,000 for a community lot, then the random bouquets and gifts...

 

 Rosco! I almost forgot you were here! Happy birthday, boy!

 

Oh, boy. Looks like it's inspection day! Good luck, guys.

 

 Well, it looks like they made the cut!

 

And I can only imagine why Kentucky wanted the wishing well...

 

 Well, this should made the 20 WooHoo's quicker. But I hope you know better than to WooHoo with them on this lot while Paris is home.

Kentucky: You think I'm stupid? That's why we have the community center.

Your daughter's future business...

Kentucky: She's still in high school right now. She's not using it! 

 

Man, Kentucky! At least keep the bed inside the building!

Kentucky: Who wants to WooHoo in a public gym or roller rink?

 

 Well, at least we've got some appropriate romance going on...

 

And here's wishing well-hussy number two...

 

 And number 3...

 

Paris: So you're here to discuss business with Kentucky? 

Lydia: Um...yeah. 

Paris: Then why are you in a swimsuit?

Lydia: Well, it's...beach day at the office.

 

 Madrid: Dad, can Mark and I go down to the...what the....

 Oops...guess Kentucky forgot it was Saturday.

   

Madrid: Dad, who was that woman?

Kentucky: That was....Sandy. 

Madrid: Sandy? Who's Sandy? How long have you been cheating on Mom?

Kentucky: I'm not cheating. We're not married.

Madrid: That doesn't mean it's not cheating!

 

Madrid: Mom...there's something you have to know about Dad.

Paris: Oh, about how he burned his dinner last night? I already know-it stunk up the entire house.

Madrid: Oh...ok...

Seriously, she just saw her father cheat on her mother and the secret she chose to tell when "gossiping" was that he burned his food the night before.

 

Ahh! It's Samara...oh, wait, it's just Mrs. Crumplebottom.  

   

 I guess Kentucky wished too many times...

 

Seriously? He's getting in a physical fight with her?

 

 Good job, Madrid...despite the rocky family situation...

 

Uh-oh...Kentucky, you idiot...

 

 Paris: What? Why would you send me out here to watch this?

Because you need to know! And clearly having you watch it happen is the only way for you to figure it out!

 

Paris: How could you! We've raised two children together! We're a family! How could you do this?

 

And it looks like Madrid is chewing out the other side...

Madrid: What kind of hussy are you, anyway, coming between my mom and dad?

 Dagmar: Honey, if your dad really wanted to be with your mom he wouldn't have been looking for me.

 Ok, as much as I hate to leave at this tense moment, I really have to be on my way. I'll check back into this soap opera next round.

 

A Message From the Mysterious Voice: Well, I finally did it. I figured now that Paris doesn't have any kids to raise it's time the rose-colored glasses came off. Kentucky is now up to 6 Sims that he's WooHoo-ed with. And I purposely had him get caught on Sunday night, because next round if I choose to have him move out, he can do it on Monday and his aging won't be off from the rest of the town.